I Don't Mind Seeing Two Guys Kissing,

I'd Been Doing Some Light-beer Commercials For Budweiser And Coors, And I Was Doing Stand-up Comedy. I Wanted To Get Into The Acting World, And My Agent Sent Me On Audition And They Liked It.

I'm Kevin Nealon, And That's News To Me.

I Tried To Read The Bible, I Did, But It Always Felt Like A Much Less Awesome Lord Of The Rings.

Don't Play Dead With A Vulture. That's Exactly What They Want.

I Remember The First Date I Ever Went Out On. It Was In High School. Her Name Was Marguerite. She Was Kind Of A Heavyset Girl... I Took Her Out On One Date. We Went Out For Dinner And A Movie And A Dinner.