I Am To Provide The Public With

These Are Bagpipes. I Understand The Inventor Of The Bagpipes Was Inspired When He Saw A Man Carrying An Indignant, Asthmatic Pig Under His Arm. Unfortunately, The Man-made Sound Never Equalled The Purity Of The Sound Achieved By The Pig.

All Love Scenes Started On The Set Are Continued In The Dressing Room.

I Can't Read Fiction Without Visualizing Every Scene. The Result Is It Becomes A Series Of Pictures Rather Than A Book.

If It's A Good Movie, The Sound Could Go Off And The Audience Would Still Have A Perfectly Clear Idea Of What Was Going On.

The Length Of A Film Should Be Directly Related To The Endurance Of The Human Bladder.