I Am Proud That I Defy Your

Laughter Rarely Lasts Longer Than A Few Seconds, It's True. But How Enjoyable Those Few Seconds Are.

I Was Horribly Bookish, To The Point Of Coming Right Out And Saying It, Which I Knew Was Not Socially Acceptable. I Particularly Loved The Adjective Bookish, Which I Found Other People Used About As Often As Ramrod Or Chum Or Teetotaler.

Pink Is Female - But Why? Are Girls Any More Pink Than Boys? Are Boys Any More Blue Than Girls? It's Something That Has Been Sold To Us, Mostly So Other Things Can Be Sold To Us.

Are You A Vegetarian?' I Ask, Based On The Evidence In Front Of Me. She Nods. 'why?' 'because I Have This Theory That When We Die, Every Animal That We've Eaten Has A Chance At Eating Us Back. So If You're A Carnivore And You Add Up All The Animals You've Eaten--well, That's A Long Time In Purgatory, Being Chewed.' 'really?' She Laughs. 'no. I'm Just Sick Of The Question. I Mean, I'm A Vegetarian Because I Think It's Wrong To Eat Other Sentient Creatures. And It Sucks For The Environment.

I Am Jealous Of Anyone Who Can Make Other People Care So Much.