I Am Going To The Bad Place,

If Psychoanalysis Was Late 19th Century Secular Judaism’s Way Of Finding Spiritual Meaning In A Post-religious World, And Retail Is The Late 20th Century’s Way Of Finding Spiritual Meaning In A Post-religious World, What Does It Mean That I’m Impersonating The Father Of Psychoanalysis In A Store Window To Commemorate A Religious Holiday?

There Is Supercomputer Somewhere In The Nevada Desert Whose Sole Function Is To Count The Number Of Times That I Have Said The Following, Because It Is Unquantifiable By Human Minds At This Point, But This Time It’s Really True: I Should Have Stayed Home.

We’re Creatures Of Contact Regardless Of Whether/ We Kiss Or We Wound. Still, We Must Come Together.

Unfortunately, There's No Greater Rhyme Or Reason As To Why It Would Be Me. And Since There Is No Answer As To Why Me, It's Not A Question I Feel Really Entitled To Ask.

In The Window, I Fantasize... About Providing Grown-ups And Children Alike With The Greatest Gift Of All: Insight.