Humans Are The Only Animal Who Can

President Obama Has Two Years Left As President. I Wouldn't Be Surprised If He Gets To Appoint Two New Kardashian Husbands.

In Hollywood, Oscar Is King.

The President Met With Bp Ceo Tony Hayward, And Obama Was Demanding That Bp Clean Up The Gulf. And I'm Thinking, Good Luck. They Can't Even Clean Up Their Gas Station Restrooms.

Mitt Romney Had A Horse Competing In The Olympics. He Didn't Win. But Next Year, He'll Be Competing In 'dancing With The Stars.'

Stocks Are At An All-time High Today. I Don't Have Any Money In The Stock Market. I Don't Have The Stomach For The Ups And Downs. So About 20 Years Ago I Put All Of My Money And Liquid Assets Into Videotape Rewind Machines.