Hors D'oeuvre: A Ham Sandwich Cut Into

No Matter How Often I Tell People I'm Thirty-nine Some Of Them Refuse To Believe I'm That Old.

I'm An Old Newspaper-man Myself, But I Quit Because I Found There Was No Money In Old Newspapers.

I Believe In Being Honest With Myself. If There's One Thing I Hate It's When A Comedian Is Great And Won't Admit It. I've Never Met One Like That, But If I Did, I'd Hate Them.

My Wife Mary And I Have Been Married For Forty-seven Years And Not Once Have We Had An Argument Serious Enough To Consider Divorce; Murder, Yes, But Divorce, Never.

Bill Paley Is Not Only The Greatest Boss I Ever Had, But He's The Most Brilliant, Honest And Warm Human Being I've Ever Met. And I'll Say That To His Face - Even If It Costs Me My Job.