Here's Something To Think About: How Come

Remember When We Used To Worry About Some Weirdo Having A Razor Blade Inside An Apple On Halloween? Not Anymore. Like A Kid Today Would Eat An Apple.

British Scientists Say They Have Developed A Super Broccoli That Can Help Fight Heart Disease. You Know, If You Want To Fight Heart Disease, Why Don't You Come Up With A Food People Will Actually Eat? Like A Super Glazed Doughnut.

Saddam Hussein Is Dead, And Osama Bin Laden Is Dead. If You’re Moammar Gadhafi, Living In Exile Is Starting To Sound Really Good.

Martha Stewart Was Found Guilty On All Charges. You Know What That Means, Stripes Are In This Year.

We Ought To Thank President Bush. He Made It A Lot Easier For People To Do Taxes This Year. No Job, No Income Tax This Year.