Grass Is The Least Rewarding Of All

My Natural Instinct After Doing Something Shameful Is Not To Rush Into The Street Boasting About It But To Put On Dark Glasses And Head For The Next County, Hoping Nobody Notices I've Been In The Neighborhood.

The Government Cannot Afford To Have A Country Made Up Entirely Of Rich People, Because Rich People Pay So Little Tax That The Government Would Quickly Go Bankrupt. This Is Why Government Men Always Tell Us That Labor Is Man's Noblest Calling. Government Needs Labor To Pay Its Upkeep.

The Worst Thing About The Miracle Of Modern Communications Is The Pavlovian Pressure It Places Upon Everyone To Communicate Whenever A Bell Rings.

Situation Comedy On Television Has Thrived For Years On 'canned' Laughter, Grafted By Gaglines By Technicians Using Records Of Guffawing Audiences That Have Been Dead For Years.

Baltimore Is Permissiveness. The Pleasures Of The Flesh, The Table, The Bottle, And The Purse Are Tolerated With A Civilized Understanding.