If I Had A Hammer, There'd Be

The Zombie Sex, I Have No Idea. It Must Be Like Tantric Sex.

My Parents Used To Take Me To The Pet Department And Tell Me It Was A Zoo.

,000 People In Hampden Park. Of Course They're All Scottish. Because No One Else Goes There. The English Have An Unwritten Rule: They Only Go To Places They Might Get Back From.

I Hate All Those Weathermen, Too, Who Tell You That Rain Is Bad Weather. There's No Such Thing As Bad Weather, Just The Wrong Clothing.

Why Do They Call It An Asteroid When It's Outside The Hemisphere, But Call It A Haemorrhoid When It's On The Outside Of Your Ass?