Ever Eat So Much You Feel Sick?

The Pearly Gates. Am I The Only One Who Finds It Odd That Heaven Has Gates? What Kind Of Neighborhood Is Heaven In?

When You Have Five Little Kids, You're Not Going To Open Mindy Kaling's Latest Book. You're Playing With Your Kids.

You Can Never Look That Tough In Glasses. ... You Never See Somebody Push Up Their Glasses And Say, "i'm Gonna Kick Your Ass."

There Were Times In My Life When I Had One Thing To Do All Day, But I Still Couldn’t Get To It. “i Gotta Go To The Post Office, But I’d Probably Have To Put On Pants. And They’re Only Open Till Five. Looks Like I’m Going To Have To Do That Next Week.

If Only Opening A Vitamin Water Could Be Classified As Working Out.