Don't Hit Women. Never, Ever, Ever.

I Used To Love Going Fishing. I Think It Was Really About The Clothes. Nothing Says Real Man Like A Vest With 38 Pockets And A Mesh Hat With Hooks In It.

I Think Commercialism Helps Christmas And I Think That The More Capitalism We Can Inject Into The Christmas Holiday The More Spiritual I Feel About It

I View My Own Body As A Petting Zoo. I Am The Main Attraction... And The Only Customer.

If I Have A Near-beer, I’m Near Beer. And If I’m Near Beer, I’m Close To Tequila. And If I’m Close To Tequila, I’m Adjacent To Cocaine.

I'm Not So Much A Dragon Slayer, More A Dragon Annoyer -- I'm A Dragon Irritater.