As You Know Now, Rush Limbaugh Is

Let's Stop For A Moment To Admire The Rotating Pies.

I Have Nothing Against The North Koreans But This Kim Jong Un Has Got A Screw Loose. A Member Of His Cabinet, His Security Minister, Nods Off, Falls Sleep. We've All Done It. Kim Jong Un Takes The Guy Out And Has Him Executed, Just For Just Falling Asleep. Oh, And He Was Also Deflating Footballs.

There Just Isn't Enough Televised Chess

I Hate Decaffeinated Coffee. It's Useless Brown Water.

Let Me Just Say This: You Know Your Campaign Is Not Going Well When You Open A Press Conference By Saying, 'i Told You There Would Be More Lewd Photos'.