Anyone Who's Ever Had The Misfortune Of

I Prefer For A Woman's Most Private Of Areas To Have As Much Hair As Carlos Santana's Entire Band, Head To Toe, Circa 1972.

I'm Arrogant Enough To Tell You That I'm Smart Enough To Have Scored Higher On My Scholastic Aptitude Test Than Any Us President Whose Sat Score Has Been Made Public. I Even Scored Higher Than Ex-presidential Candidate Al Gore, Whose Sat Score Was So High, It Was Deemed As Potentially Off-putting To Voters.

Unlike The Vast Majority Of People, I've Been Locked In A Box Like An Animal And I've Also Been On The Receiving End Of Bloody Thrashings, So I Feel Uniquely Qualified To Judge Which Is Worse.

Governments Throughout The English-speaking Sphere Are Creating And Then Ratcheting The Torque On "hate-speech" Laws With Frightening Eagerness.

There Were People Whom I Considered Friends Or Loved Ones Who Either Abandoned Me Or Betrayed Me In Ways I'd Never Have Suspected. But There Were Others Who Had Been Barely Acquaintances Of Mine Whose Loyalty And Efforts On My Behalf Made Me Realize That Not Everyone Was As Inherently Rotten As I'd Previously Believed. So It Caused A Violent Split In My View Of Humanity - People Turned Out To Be Far Worse And Far Better Than I'd Ever Dreamed Possible.